Japoneses simpaticos!

Asi es la vida...

Los Rebeldes del Rock - La Hiedra Venenosa

Girls are evil

Las matematicas explican todo!

Ask a silly question

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Pal Diet again although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Pal nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door. Stupid b*tch...why else would I buy dog food?? Tomado de aquí

Hala Madrid! 30 y contando!

Este fin de semana el Real Madrid se proclamo flamante campeón de la liga de las estrellas tras superar en un emocionante partido al Mallorca por 3 a 1. Se adelanto el Mallorca y ganaba el Barca pero todo estaba planeado para que se emocionaran y después pudiéramos cantar:

¡Etoo, cabron, saluda al campeón!

Con esta es la liga número 30 que se lleva el Madrid y llega a lo más alto del futbol español mostrando una clarísima superioridad frente a los demás equipos. David Beckam y Roberto Carlos celebraron su ultimo partido como merengues, el ingles se va al LA Galaxy y el brasileño después de 11 temporadas en el Madrid se va al Fenerbahçe Turco.

Hala Madrid, la siguiente temporada la decima!

50 cosas que hacer

Fifty Fun Things To Do During A Final That You Know You Are Going To Fail

1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early. 2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!" 3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol. 4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril. 5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is. 6. Bring cheerleaders. 7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?" 8. Bring a Game Boy (or Game Gear, etc...). Play with the volume at max level. 9. On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative. 10. Bring pets. 11. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off. 12. Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes. 13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers. 14. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else. 15. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible. 16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals. 17. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you. 18. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it. 19. Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay. 20. Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam. 21. Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was. 22. Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB. BABE. etc..). 23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out. 24. Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Fuck this!" and walk out triumphantly. 25. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink) 26. Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy). 27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!" 28. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day. 29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away. 30. Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for your right to take the exam. 31. Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!!!" 32. Bring a water pistol with you. Nuff said. 33. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai. 34. Start a brawl in the middle of the exam. 35. If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story. 36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield. 37. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation. 38. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit." 39. When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip. 40. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her. 41. One word: Wrestlemania. 42. Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start. 43. Try to get people in the room to do the wave. 44. Play frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room. 45. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice. 46. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc... sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam. 47. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach. 48. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle. 49. Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told you so". 50. Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why Professor xxxx Sucks"

Ejemplos (da click en la imagen para verla mas grande):

McDONALDS APPLICATION

This is an actual job application a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida – and they hired him because he was so honest and funny! NAME: Greg Bulmash SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person. DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I were in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place. DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle. EDUCATION: Yes. LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility. SALARY: Less than I'm worth. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS? Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR? I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs? HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes. DO YOU SMOKE? On the job no, on my breaks yes. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS? Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE? Yes – Absolutely. SIGN HERE: Aries.

Links que merecen la pena

Les dejo unos cuantos links interesantes muy creativos para que vean que internet no es solo para pornografia y messenger!

• http://www.sport.gr/fun/analatos/video/06162005170419937g.swf
• http://www.grotrian.de/spiel/d/spiel_win.html
• http://ml.hoogerbrugge.com/
• http://www.oddcast.com/home/demos/tts/tts_example.php?sitepal
• http://interact10ways.com/usa/information_interactive.htm
• http://www.chordstudio.com/ChordStudio/index.htm
• http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
• http://www.stripegenerator.com/
• http://www.pixar.com/shorts/index.html
• http://www.zuzafun.com/surreal-pictures

Si tienen alguna pagina del estilo compartan!

Etch - A - Sketch

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Tu que haces en tus ratos libres?

Un sustito!

Alguien me puede explicar la cabrona de la mamá que lo esta grabando!

Aviso importante

Thou shalt always kill

Thou shalt not steal if there is direct victim. Thou shalt not worship pop idols or follow lost prophets. Thou shalt not take the names of Johnny Cash, Joe Strummer, Johnny Hartman, Desmond Decker, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix or Syd Barret in vain. Thou shalt not think that any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a peadophile… Some people are just nice. Thou shalt not read NME. Thall shalt not stop liking a band just because they've become popular. Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry. Thou shalt not judge a book by it's cover. Thou shalt not judge Lethal Weapon by Danny Glover. Thall shalt not buy Coca-Cola products. Thou shalt not buy Nestle products. Thou shalt not go into the woods with your boyfriend's best friend, take drugs and cheat on him. Thou shalt not fall in love so easily. Thou shalt not use poetry, art or music to get into girls' pants. Use it to get into their heads. Thou shalt not watch Hollyokes. Thou shalt not attend an open mic and leave before it's done just because you've finished your shitty little poem or song you self-righteous prick. Thou shalt not return to the same club or bar week in, week out just 'cause you once saw a girl there that you fancied but you're never gonna fucking talk to. Thou shalt not put musicians and recording artists on ridiculous pedestals no matter how great they are or were. The Beatles… Were just a band. Led Zepplin… Just a band. The Beach Boys… Just a band. The Sex Pistols… Just a band. The Clash… Just a band. Crass… Just a band. Minor Threat… Just a band. The Cure… Just a band. The Smiths… Just a band. Nirvana… Just a band. The Pixies… Just a band. Oasis… Just a band. Radiohead… Just a band. Bloc Party… Just a band. [ed.'s note: this is debatable] The Arctic Monkeys… Just a band. The Next Big Thing.. JUST A BAND. Thou shalt give equal worth to tragedies that occur in non-english speaking countries as to those that occur in english speaking countries. Thou shalt remember that guns, bitches and bling were never part of the four elements and never will be. Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music. Thou shalt not pimp my ride. Thou shalt not scream if you wanna go faster. Thou shalt not move to the sound of the wickedness. Thou shalt not make some noise for Detroit. When I say "Hey" thou shalt not say "Ho". When I say "Hip" thou shalt not say "Hop". When I say, he say, she say, we say, make some noise… kill me. Thou shalt not quote me happy. Thou shalt not shake it like a polaroid picture. Thou shalt not wish you girlfriend was a freak like me. Thou shalt spell the word "Pheonix" P-H-E-O-N-I-X not P-H-O-E-N-I-X, regardless of what the Oxford English Dictionary tells you. Thou shalt not express your shock at the fact that Sharon got off with Bradley at the club last night by saying "Is it". Thou shalt think for yourselves. And thou shalt always… Thou shalt always kill!